In most jobs, feedback is the key to success. Giving it constructively, and receiving it humbly.
However, the job of being a mother is not one of them. Try telling a mother how she SHOULD be doing something, or how her child SHOULD be acting. You set yourself up to bring on a wrath like no other. Women know this, and still they attack the parenting choices of others. The biggest argument I see on a regular basis is breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is of course, the healthiest option. BUT, it is also only as healthy as the mother manages it to be. Even still, breastfeeding your children does not come with the requirement of self-righteousness. Sure, you want to educate people on the choice they are making, it can be all the difference for some mothers, but others are content with how they are raising their offspring. So, not only do some mothers need to be educated on the feeding choice of their babies, but other mothers obviously need to be educated on boundary issues. And, I don't mean with passive aggressive bullshit either. "Oh, yeah. You're still a great mother if you don't breastfeed...I JUST LIKE TO DO WHAT'S BEST FOR MY BABY". Ummmm...yeah. We ALL like to do what is best, and we try to do what we think is best. What we don't need are judgemental mothers trotting around like egotistical harpies. Being a mother is hard enough. Sleepless nights, stressful days, teaching, educating, playing, feeding, training, it doesn't end. All of these things with constant worry and paranoia about each milestone and achievement from birth until the end of time for our kids. Instead of worrying about mothers who feed their babies formula, rather than straight out the nip, worry about the babies who get nothing to eat, or little to no nourishment at all. Focus some of your attention on a cause like that. Whatever you do though, keep in mind that just because you are a mother who rings the dinner bell under her blouse, doesn't mean you have to slip into your judgey pants while doing it.
However, the job of being a mother is not one of them. Try telling a mother how she SHOULD be doing something, or how her child SHOULD be acting. You set yourself up to bring on a wrath like no other. Women know this, and still they attack the parenting choices of others. The biggest argument I see on a regular basis is breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is of course, the healthiest option. BUT, it is also only as healthy as the mother manages it to be. Even still, breastfeeding your children does not come with the requirement of self-righteousness. Sure, you want to educate people on the choice they are making, it can be all the difference for some mothers, but others are content with how they are raising their offspring. So, not only do some mothers need to be educated on the feeding choice of their babies, but other mothers obviously need to be educated on boundary issues. And, I don't mean with passive aggressive bullshit either. "Oh, yeah. You're still a great mother if you don't breastfeed...I JUST LIKE TO DO WHAT'S BEST FOR MY BABY". Ummmm...yeah. We ALL like to do what is best, and we try to do what we think is best. What we don't need are judgemental mothers trotting around like egotistical harpies. Being a mother is hard enough. Sleepless nights, stressful days, teaching, educating, playing, feeding, training, it doesn't end. All of these things with constant worry and paranoia about each milestone and achievement from birth until the end of time for our kids. Instead of worrying about mothers who feed their babies formula, rather than straight out the nip, worry about the babies who get nothing to eat, or little to no nourishment at all. Focus some of your attention on a cause like that. Whatever you do though, keep in mind that just because you are a mother who rings the dinner bell under her blouse, doesn't mean you have to slip into your judgey pants while doing it.
How about personal? respect? support?
another great post:)tif
ReplyDeleteWell I didn't breast feed and I have the best kids in the U.S.. lmao.. and I smoked cig,and pot while pregnant and look they are fine..(I don't do either of the two anymore). My daughter would like to blame her breathing on me but she is 23 start breathing on your own.. This was many years ago and we didn't know the things we do now but mine are just fine. I won't leave my name because I am a little embarrassed by it still. Jen knows who I am. I do think Breast is best these days for the baby and because we have all the Psychos out there contaminating formulas.. At least if Mom is eating right and following the rules whatever comes out of the breast is what went into Mom, breast feed away.. I hate the Mom's who are breast feeding with a cig hanging out there mouth or a wide mouth beer to their lips. It defeats the purpose. I just think if I did breast feed my poor kids wouldn't be so stupid..(JK) lmao..
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